Murder by Cancer

MARCH 31, 2020

When someone from the Metastatic breast cancer community dies, we don’t say they lost their battle.  We don’t say they passed away.  We say another beautiful soul was murdered by Metastatic Breast Cancer. We use the term MURDER; it is the only word strong enough to express our outrage.  Technically, murder is not the right word.  But emotionally it is exactly the right word.

Metastatic Breast Cancer stalks us like a skilled assassin.  We never know when it will strike but we feel its constant presence.  And we do fight back, with super-human power.  Enduring harsh infusions, pills, and chemicals. Amputations. Radiation. Treatments.

We know from the beginning that we are fighting a losing battle.  We accept that, and we fight not against cancer, but we fight instead for our quality of life.  And for time.  We mostly fight for time.

Time to spend with our beloved family and friends. Time for advocacy; to make things better, easier, accountable, available, equitable, safer, and transparent for those walking behind us. 

We stand tall.  We lead with a big flag.  Or a bus.  A Facebook community.  We light buildings.  We show up at conferences.  We lead with poetry. With art.  With words.  We lead with truth.  Agency.  Accountability.  Community.  We lay down to be counted.  We stand up to be heard.  One voice.  MBC.

And when one of us dies, we say MURDERED!  Our condolences end with Rest in Power. 

And we mourn together; online-- socially distanced but emotionally connected.  We share photos, stories and grieve together.  Gone but not forgotten, memories will serve as blessings, and tears to ease pain and give relief.  Clichés are suddenly gold.  We remind each other to breathe.  When we return to our own front line, we push back with more resolve.  Reminded of our assassin.  Try to get further away.  Too many murdered. 

Yes, Rest in Power. 

In memory of the 116 people who die of MBC, every day.